What a Single Girl Wants

OK, so most of you know I am divorced, and that came about as a result of circumstances I had no hand in. As with anything, there comes a time when a woman wants to have another relationship, even if that means opening herself to the possibility of being hurt.

During this time I have been putting myself out there to see what I can find.... and it ain't pretty.
I have found a variety of men. Some are wonderful, some are not. Some are witty, some are not. Some are full of promise, some are not and some are full of manners and some ARE NOT.

Firstly, I dont want a man who is nearly the same age of my father. My father is older because he was an adult when I was born, it is not cool to think a 30 something woman wants to date a man who was old enough to drink legally when she was born. Its what I call the ick factor.

Also I have preferences. These do not make me a bad person, just selective. I do not want someome excesively old, or excessively young. I do not personally want to date a black man. I am not looking to be someone's "visa express" to get them in or keep them in the country. I am not interested in being your sexual liason to make you feel good about yourself.

I am 32 years old. I am once divorced, no children and no arrest record or questionable activities in my past. I have wants and needs for myself and I feel that I have been compromising these wants and needs because people in my life tell me that this i the best I am gonna get. That isnt true. I know that what I want is out there, just the where is what I need to know.

Here are some guidelines for men:

If I say I am interested in a Long term relationship, thats exactly what it means. If you are looking for a casual daaliance, keep it moving.

I am a woman with curves. There is no Barbie doll here. If you are simply affected by what you visually and you cant get past that, keep going and refrain from your nasty comments. If I am going to change my body, it will be because I want it, not to please you.

When a woman says no, she means no. This does not mean she wants to find herself in a position to keep fighting off your Octopus limbs and inappropriate contact. Nor does she want you to take her hand and repeatedly have to fight to not put it where you want it to be. I am not that kind of girl and if you force my hand so to speak I will kick your ass. This is your only warning.

Women want to feel like the man is interested in them and not that they are simply what is available to them. Men : Make the gesture. Show the lady you are interested. Woo her. Send her a card or flowers, srprise her with a visit at her work or a night out for dinner. Dont let her ever think she is a burden, that she is a filler for your time when there is nothing else going on for you.

Smell good, dress nice (and clean) dont be too pushy with the physical contact if she isnt ready, if you cant be with her, cant make your chat date or whatever the situation, a quick call or text is appreciated. It lets her know you appreciate her time and that you respect her enough to let her make other plans.

Men: Know how to kiss a lady. Dont come at her with your mouth puckered open like a fish trying to get a hook out of their mouth. Girls dont like bad kissers, they dont want their face swallowed off. Kissing is supposed to be a sensual act of interest between two people, not a fight for one to retain part of their face.

I know it seems like I am being picky, but I dont think that I should be treated like "green grass" while you toy with me while you find the "greener grass". I am the Greener Grass and the sooner you figure it out and start treating me with respect, the sooner I will respond favorably.

I know that there is more to be said, but I need to end here for tonight.

Let the feedback roll :)